When You Have It

One of the greatest singer songwriters once said:

“Oh life is like a maze of doors

And they all open from the side you’re on

Just keep on pushin hard boy, you try as you may.”

That is the closing verse of the song Sitting by Cat Stevens, released in the early 1970’s. Every time I listen to that song the volume goes up, I sing out loud, and my energetic glow shoots out of me like a fireworks finale.

I started listening to Cat Stevens at a young age, I can’t remember exactly when, I just know I was young. My dad introduced me to so many classics, way too many to say. The music has always stayed with me, it never “got old.” I am so grateful for that. No matter where I was, in a big city or small town, I could always play songs that reminded me of growing up and where I currently was at that exact moment. It’s fascinating how music can morph past and present feelings while also loving it like it’s a new song you’ve never heard. 

I recently took the first step on one of the biggest journeys I have EVER taken in my life. Believe me, I have taken MANY journeys over the years so to say this is the biggest, trust me, it is. Within 48 hours the feelings of excitement, self doubt, fear, intrigue, and confidence scrambled through my mind. Like ants on hot pavement. Some thoughts weighed heavier than others, nonetheless they were all present. When I tell you how important it is to have the right support while doing something that entails “stepping your game up” please take my words seriously.  Having people that support you, I mean the deep down you, is a blessing. Family, friends, lovers, mentors, co-workers, it does not matter who they are, as long as they “get ya.” Someone whom I love very much, a great friend and my mother all told me basically the same thing. Without even knowing the other said it! Must mean something right?  “Get settled in”...”This is all new”…”Focus one day at a time”….All sounds so simplistic, it actually really is, but when your mind is going 7,846 mph nothing sounds simple. 

So getting back to the song. Despite the support, advice and love being given, at the end of the day, I still have to answer to myself. I am the only one that can make the final decision as to what I can and can’t do. That is what Cat Stevens is saying. We have to find our own way, pave our own path, and make decisions no matter how hard or lonely the journey may be. And what I think is beautiful; while digging your fingers and nails deep into the dirt during times of darkness, then eventually seeing that crack of light, it will open up like the sun rising and shine so brightly through me. 

One line in the song says “I feel the power growing in my hair.” Damn Cat, those eight words, just brilliant. When you feel that power, when you have it, hold onto it like a golden lasso. That is when you can do anything, be in the category of the opposite percentile of the people who don’t finish.